Last night we had a catch up session with our two amazing leaders. It was one of the best evenings I have had for such a long time. We were able to be honest, trade stories, find wisdom, laugh and seek God together in such an authentic way. We were so blessed by this time.
The topic we worked on was unity in marriage and how to deepen our sense of oneness. As part of the session we looked at Genesis 2:18-25 and God's introduction of Eve into Adam's world.
The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
Now the Lord God had formed out of the ground all the wild animals and all the birds in the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds in the sky and all the wild animals.
But for Adam no suitable helper was found. So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man’s ribs and then closed up the place with flesh. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
The man said,“This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my flesh;
she shall be called ‘woman,’
for she was taken out of man.”That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.
Adam and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.
(As an aside, the feminist in me would like to point out a couple of things we learned and discussed before I go on. The Hebrew for 'helper' translates to 'opposite against', an equal who supports the man who needs help. 'Suitable' means 'being like another', matching him and complementary. So the term 'helper' isn't a term to indicate inferiority. The same term is used of the Holy Spirit on occasion. Just wanted to get that out of the way.)
I was really struck by God's reflection, "It is not good for the man to be alone."
We wondered, was Adam happy? Was he lonely? In original creation, before sin and ruin and any sense of the world being broken, when Adam was in perfect unity with the world and God, it is hard to imagine that Adam was deeply discontent or unhappy.
Arguably, Adam wouldn't have known anything else. He wouldn't have known what it was like to not be alone, in charge of the animals with no 'helper suitable for him'. He would have been content in a perfect relationship with and trust in God.
Yet God declares that things are not good, it isn't good for Adam to be alone. God knows Adam better than he knows himself. He knows that he needs someone else.
What struck me beyond all this was that God acknowledges that living with God and without people isn't enough. We are made for relationship with each other. It isn't enough to just be in relationship with God, we must be relating to other people.
But the truth seems to go even further than this - this isn't just true for us, in a world overpopulating and teeming with people to relate to. It was true for Adam, in perfect creation, at peace with himself, the universe and his maker.
People need other people.
When I was younger, and now in my more melancholy moments, I used to think that being a hermit and being at one with God would be enough. That it would be better for me to be alone - it would be a lot less messy and less harmful for other people. As long as I could be with God, in a good, fully open, submitted relationship with him, then that would be enough.
I was challenged by the study last night. Because I realised that God doesn't want that. It wasn't part of His original design. God wants us to be in union with other people. We are not supposed to be alone, no matter how much we are satisfied by Him.
God made us to need Him and to need each other.
And God knows us far better than we know ourselves.
